Kieran Rates the Second Eurovision 2013 Semi-Final

We sat down today with Kieran and watched the run-through of this year’s second Eurovision Semi-Final to gather his thoughts. Remember: he is four.

Also, at a certain point (namely, during Israel’s song) he got tired of dancing and also started to hate everything. Four-year-olds are fickle.

1. Latvia: PeR – “Here We Go

Did Kieran dance? Yes, the Foot Turn Dance.

Did Kieran say he liked it? Yes.

What did Kieran have to say?

“It makes me turn my foot around. And then FALL DOWN!” (Falls down.)

2. San Marino: Valentina Monetta – “Crisalide

Did Kieran dance? Yes, “This is the Falling Down Dance just like in ‘Birds‘!”

Did Kieran say he liked it? Yes.

What did Kieran have to say?

“It’s good!”

“That dress is too big for her.”

Does an interpretive dance in addition to the Falling Down Dance.

3. FYR Macedonia: Esma & Lozano – “Pred da se razdeni

Did Kieran dance? Yes, the Blocks Falling Dance.

Did Kieran say he liked it? Yes.

What did Kieran have to say?

“I like both of them because of their heads.”

4. Azerbaijan: Farid Mammadov – “Hold Me

Did Kieran dance? Yes, the Zoo-la-loo-la-loo-la Dance, which involved arm swinging.

Did Kieran say he liked it? Yes.

What did Kieran have to say?

“It’s weird he says ‘hold’ because I don’t like that word.”

5. Finland: Krista Siegrieds – “Marry Me

Did Kieran dance? Yes, the Jump Dance. For a little while.

Did Kieran say he liked it? Yes, but…

What did Kieran have to say?

After a minute, he walks away and starts playing with marbles.

“This video is a little bit scary.”

6. Malta: Gianluca Bezzina – “Tomorrow

Did Kieran dance? Yes, the Hopping on One Foot Dance.

Did Kieran say he liked it? Yes.

What did Kieran have to say?

Doesn’t say anything, just watches the video. While hopping on one foot.

7. Bulgaria: Elitsa Todorova and Stoyan Yankoulov – “Samo Shampioni

Did Kieran dance? Yes, the Crazy Hands Dance, which includes lying down and kicking his feet and doing headstands.

Did Kieran say he liked it? Yes.

What did Kieran have to say?

At the start of the song, he stood and scratched his head. Then busted out the Crazy Hands dance.

8. Iceland: Eyþór Ingi Gunnlaugsson – “Ég á Líf

Did Kieran dance? Yes, the Toad-morey Dance. “It’s really slow because it doesn’t go fast.”

Did Kieran say he liked it? Yes.

What did Kieran have to say?

“His letter is all wet because he fell into the water!”

9. Greece: Koza Mostra feat. Agathonas Iakovides – “Alcohol is free

Did Kieran dance? Yes, the Fasty-o-wig Dance. There is a lot of running fast in place and kicking.

Did Kieran say he liked it? Yes.

What did Kieran have to say?

Hours later, Kieran started to sing, “Abbawah abbawah abbawah is free” over and over again.

10. Israel: Moran Mazor – “Rak Bishvilo

Did Kieran dance? No. “I’m tired of dancing.”

Did Kieran say he liked it? No.

What did Kieran have to say?

“Actually, I don’t like this song.”

Leaves the room. Comes back with a bag of marshmallows

11. Armenia: Dorians – ”Lonely Planet

Did Kieran dance? No.

Did Kieran say he liked it? No,

What did Kieran have to say?

Mostly he sat and ate marshmallows.

“I don’t like this because of their shirts. Why are they singing on their shirts?”

12. Hungary: ByeAlex – “Kedvesem

Did Kieran dance? No.

Did Kieran say he liked it? No.

What did Kieran have to say?

“It’s just bad, bad, bad.”

13. Norway: Margaret Berger – “I Feed You My Love

Did Kieran dance? No.

Did Kieran say he liked it? No.

What did Kieran have to say?

“I don’t hear any drums.”

14. Albania: Adrian Lulgjuraj &  Bledar Sejko – “Identiet

Did Kieran dance? No.

Did Kieran say he liked it? No.

What did Kieran have to say?

“Oh no, smoke!”

“That’s cool! They’re outside!”

“I don’t like this because of the smoke.”

15. Georgia: Nodi & Sophie – “Waterfall

Did Kieran dance? No.

Did Kieran say he liked it? No.

What did Kieran have to say?

“Her name is Sophie! I go to school with Sophie!”

16. Switzerland: Takasa (nee Heilsarmee) – “You and me

Did Kieran dance? No.

Did Kieran say he liked it? Yes.

What did Kieran have to say?

“They are eating in the car. They have to wait until they get home.”

17. Romania: Cezar – “It’s My Life

Did Kieran dance? No.

Did Kieran say he liked it? No.

What did Kieran have to say?

When Chris asks Kieran if he likes it, Kieran shoots him a dirty look.

“BAD!”

THE VERDICT: Kieran’s favorite – “You and Me,” with “Here We Go” a close second. But he’s still singing “Igranka” and “Alcohol Is Free.”

UPDATE 31 MARCH 2013:  Kieran has informed us he now likes “Kedvesem” and has requested to watch the video twice today.