Eurovision 2016 Superlatives

It’s time once again for us to pay tribute to the finalists in this year’s Eurovision Song Contest the best way we know how: with bitchy quips and references to Patty Duke and obscure 1950s sci-fi films.

  • Most Successful Pastiche of Annie, Freddie Mercury & Frieda from Peanuts: Belgium
  • Best 8-Bit Stage Design: Czech Republic
  • Most Awkward 10 Seconds: Netherlands
  • Best Use of Sale Items From Sports Authority’s Going Out of Business Sale: Azerbaijan
If this was an NFL team, it'd be called the Fire.

If this was an NFL team, it’d be called the Fire.
(Samra screenshot by Eurovision Lemurs)

  • The Sigh, So Dreamy Oh You Were Singing Something Award: Hungary
  • Best Array of Lawn Ornaments: Italy
  • The Sparkle, Neely, Sparkle Award for Sparkle: Israel
  • Best Innovation In Traffic Cop Uniform Technology: Bulgaria
  • The Frans Award for Not Caring But Really Caring: Sweden
  • Best Reason to Give Stefan Raab Millions of Euros to Run Your National Selection: Germany
  • Most Successful Theft of Austria’s Thunder: France
  • Best Tasting Schmaltz: Poland
  • Best Musical Representation of What It Would Be Like to Be the Last Person to Own a Telephone: Australia
  • Best Lupine Consolation Prize: Cyprus
  • Most Creative Use of Bobby Pins: Serbia
What's a Grown Woman Doing with a Bobby Pin?

What’s a grown woman doing with a bobby pin?
(Sanja Vučić screenshot by Eurovision Lemurs)

  • Most Donny Performance: Lithuania
  • The 3+2 Award for Best Use of Costuming to Distract You From a Mediocre Song: Croatia
  • Most In Need of a Balloon Boy, As It Turns Out: Russia
  • Most Gasp-Worthy Death Drop: Spain
  • Second Best Eurovision Entry Ever Written By Aminata: Latvia
  • Best Song That’s Not About the War That’s About the War That’s Not About the War: Ukraine
  • Best Homage to The Brain That Wouldn’t Die: Malta
The Losco That Wouldn't Die

The Losco That Wouldn’t Die
(The Brain That Wouldn’t Die screenshot by Shock Till You Drop.
Ira Losco screenshot by Eurovision Lemurs)

  • Best Depiction of a Bad LSD Trip: Georgia
  • Best Depiction of a Good LSD Trip: Austria
  • Best Theme to a Bromantic Comedy: United Kingdom
  • Winner of Eurovision’s Swimsuit Competition: Armenia
  • Most Likely to Get There, Popular: Ukraine
She is the winner of Eurovision! She is! She is!

She is the winner of Eurovision! She is! She is!
(Samra screenshot by Eurovision Lemurs)