God we hate our picks. We have no idea whatsoever what’s going to happen this year at the Eurovision Song Contest. No idea. We hate our picks, but we don’t know how else to select them.
Last Place: Germany
Last Place: Germany
Italy has been such a favorite for so long that, going into the rehearsal period, we would have thought that anyone said that someone else was going to win was just being deliberately contrarian. And yet, now that we’re on the cusp of the Grand Final and we see that Italy is performing ninth, before Portugal and before Bulgaria, we can’t shake the feeling that the favorite is going to fall short.
Are we putting too much stock in the rehearsal videos of the Big 5? Francesco Gabbani’s manic energy was a bit off-putting to us, but that is not necessarily the performance he is going to give in the Final. He’s going to turn on the charm when it really matters, right?
Watching all of the performance videos in running order, we noticed two things. One, Salvador Sobral shines bright. He’s between solid if shallow Denmark and solid if strange Azerbaijan and he stands out among the strong competition around him. Two, Kristian Kostov shines bright. He is second to last to perform and gets a favorable lead in from Belgium and Sweden. “City Lights” and “I Can’t Go On” build up to “Beautiful Mess” in a way that just elevates it. Francesco has got serious competition.
Chris is now convinced “Amar elos Dois” is going to take it. Jen is not sure and, in the face of uncertainty, she does not see enough reason to pick against “Occidentali’s Karma.” Maybe “Beautiful Mess” could take the crown, but it feels to us like a second placer. Regardless of what happens, we will be happy if any of these three songs win.
We both picked Belgium to finish fourth. Chris is doing his usual thing where he decides that a song won’t make it out of the Semifinals and then when it does, he picks it for the top 10. This year, Jen is joining him in the madness.
We feel good about our top three or four picks, but after that, the doubt and the dread and the self-loathing kick in. Is Romania really a top 10 song? Are we picking France because her staging wasn’t nearly as bad as we originally thought? Why is Jen picking Greece? Why is Chris picking Austria? Why did we not pick Norway? Oh god, we should have picked Norway.
Do we really think the United Kingdom is going to finish out of the top 10? A lot of people seem excited about “Never Give Up On You.” It is going the plum 18th spot and the staging is beautiful. But Lucie Jones gets a little “crazy ex-girlfriend who fakes her pregnancy” at the end of the song. (Versus DiHaj, who is more “crazy ex-girlfriend who keys your car.”)
Then we get to the bottom of the table and the only other thing we’re sure of is that Germany is going to finish last. The backdrop video and Levina’s costume are meant to be silver, but it all looks so gray. The only way it could have been less appealing is if the color scheme was taupe. At least Spain has surfboards. And a really awful surfer dude. Should we pick Spain to finish last? It’s so bad… No. We’re going to stick to our guns.
God, we hate our picks.